All Out of Anaesthetic | |
A dentist ran out of anaesthetic just before the last extraction for the day was scheduled. He gave the nurse a very large needle, instructing her to jab it hard into the patient's butt when the signal was given, so it would take his attention away from the tooth extraction. It all happened in an instant. The nurse, patient, and pliers were in place. The signal was given, and the nurse bayoneted the patient with the needle just as the dentist yanked the tooth. Afterwards, the dentist asked, "Hurt much?" The patient hesitated, "Didn't hardly feel it come out. And, man, those roots were really deep!" |
Lethal Food | |
A dietician was once addressing a large audience in Chicago. "The material we put into our stomachs is enough to have killed most of us sitting here, years ago. Red meat is awful. Vegetables can be disastrous, and none of us realises the germs in our drinking water. But there is one thing that is the most dangerous of all and we all eat it. Can anyone here tell me what lethal product I'm referring to?" "You, sir, in the first row, please give us your idea." The man lowered his head and said, "Wedding cake." |
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